Parker and McAdams are in charge...allegedly

Thu 08 May 2014, 5:35 pm

First topic message reminder :

Jim "Bonehead" Hargrove has today posted this at Deep Arseholes Forum:

"Soooo...

Are McAdams, Parnell, and Parker in charge now? Can no one think of anything else? Sheeesh.....

Jim"

Who made you in charge, Greg? And why didn't you tell the rest of us?

Bonehead's comment is in response to doubts being expressed that Donald O. Norton was another Lee or Harvey Oswald double (take your pick). Things were going swimmingly at first during this latest round of pure unadulterated bullshit when Peter "Paranoia" Lemkin hypothesised that Donald O. Norton himself may also have had a double. Albert "Numpty" Doyle then jumped on board claiming the whole deal was Hitchcockian in nature and compared the situation to the fictitious George Kaplan character from North by Northwest.

But then no-one could muster anything more batshit crazy and doubt was expressed about the Norton story because he had an afro or something - that has resulted in Bonehead letting the cat out of the bag concerning who the puppet masters are.

I haven't been subjected to this many doubles since seeing Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones. Harvey, Lee, Norton, Norton's double, Lee's double, Harvey's double, Marguerite, Marguerite mark II, Norton's double double, blonde Oswald, afro Norton, Norton Kaplan, Kaplan Norton, George Harvey, Harvey George, Harvey George Lee, Lee Harvey Kaplan, Kaplan Harvey, George Hitchcock, Alfred Norton, Lee Harvey Norton Hitchcock, Ralph Kramden, Ed Norton, Ralph Macchio, Mr. Miyagi.

This plot was off the fucking scales.

Regards

Lee Norton

Fri 09 May 2014, 4:53 am

Wasn't Miyagi a veteran of the Korean police action?

Fri 09 May 2014, 4:53 am

Disregarding Terry's wise "too much time on your hands" cautionary advice (because I'm retired after all), I have to toss one more thing into the mix.

Back in the glory "the only good commie is a dead commie" days, the OSS/CIA were always searching for new, creative ideas for fighting this threat, so they probed into unconventional areas for "inspiration." This included fortune tellers and cartoonists.

When government spooks got a reliable tip from Madame Iseezayouza that a very troublesome President may (later revised to "would") arrive on the scene in the years to come, the entire intelligence community was stumped as to how to deal with it.

Then one morning a big breakthrough occurred. A low-level CIA analyst was reading, of all things, the Hardware Retailer, a trade magazine for hardware store owners, and he discovered the comic strip by Russell Johnson: "Mister Oswald." He found the subject of this particular strip, the confusion resulting from two Mr. Oswalds, intriguing. Then a light bulb when off. After spirited discussion with his boss, a doppelganger plan was born.

The real cool (for them) thing happened later when they were later searching for suitable ~~patsies~~ prospects for the program, and they found a young boy named, of all things, Lee Oswald. They considered this a form a divine providence.

Like truth, history is stranger than non-fiction. Just ask the Fez.

Parker and McAdams are in charge...allegedly - Page 2 206_mr10

Parker and McAdams are in charge...allegedly - Page 2 206_mr10

Fri 09 May 2014, 5:02 am

"...and trying to buy golf carts for the counter-revolutionary efforts taking place in Augusta."

That would be like hauling coals to Newcastle. I grew up in Augusta so I know offhand that it has the two largest golf cart factories in the world (EZ-Go and Club Car) and the third (Yamaha) is in other town in Georgia. Why buy when you can just liberate the factories first?
Back on topic a moment, no JFK ties I can see for Club Car or Yamaha but EZ Go is owned by Textron, which also owns Bell Helicopter (which once employed Michael Paine). Surprised

)

Fri 09 May 2014, 5:12 am

Greg,

I think volumes 2 & 3 are writing themselves!

Fri 09 May 2014, 6:37 am

Stan,

My goodness... if that ain't the Rosetta Stone of the assassination I don't know what is.

Wife beater as well.

Fri 09 May 2014, 6:46 am

Then there is this... from 1939 no less... the elite get their jokes in early.

/ Parker and McAdams are in charge...allegedly - Page 2 Superman-jfk

Looks like Marilyn... or her double?

Fri 09 May 2014, 7:25 am

Looks like Marilyn... or her double?

Depends which Marilyn died before JFK's double.

Fri 09 May 2014, 7:59 am

beowulf wrote:"...and trying to buy golf carts for the counter-revolutionary efforts taking place in Augusta."

That would be like hauling coals to Newcastle. I grew up in Augusta so I know offhand that it has the two largest golf cart factories in the world (EZ-Go and Club Car) and the third (Yamaha) is in other town in Georgia. Why buy when you can just liberate the factories first?
Back on topic a moment, no JFK ties I can see for Club Car or Yamaha but EZ Go is owned by Textron, which also owns Bell Helicopter (which once employed Michael Paine). )

That may be so "beowulf" - if that is indeed your real name!

But you totally miss the point. Kaplan was trying to buy golf carts from the Over-The-Horizon factory in Oshkosh. This was a Commie front and Kaplan was determined to show their superiority over the more expensive Capitalist carts as some sort of continuation of the Nixon-Khrushchev Kitchen sink debate.

This was all explained in Dylan's "I shall be Free #10".

I'm gonna grow my hair down to my feet so strange (because I am a rotten Commie)
So I look like a walking mountain range (which is why you NEED Over-The Horizon brand Golf Carts)
And I’m gonna ride into Omaha on a horse (Omaha = Augusta because they have nearly the same number of letters and both use vowels)
Out to the country club and the golf course (naturally - that's where the counter-revolution is goin' down, baby!)
Carry The New York Times, shoot a few holes, blow their minds (speaks for itself really)

Fri 09 May 2014, 9:15 am

Well, as Terry stated, there are suspicious L.L. doubles here (Lois Lane, Lex Luthor, Louis Lamour, Led Landsdale), but even more suspicious M.M.s: Mary Moorman, Mary Meyer, Marilyn Monroe, Mary (Tyler) Moore, Mr Moto, Mannie Mankiewicz, Mickey Mantle ... but this is getting crazy. We've got to get our conspiracy smaller.

Fri 09 May 2014, 9:37 am

Albert Rossi wrote:Well, as Terry stated, there are suspicious L.L. doubles here (Lois Lane, Lex Luthor, Louis Lamour, Led Landsdale), but even more suspicious M.M.s: Mary Moorman, Mary Meyer, Marilyn Monroe, Mary (Tyler) Moore, Mr Moto, Mannie Mankiewicz, Mickey Mantle ... but this is getting crazy. We've got to get our conspiracy smaller.

Would using lower case help make it any smaller?

Fri 09 May 2014, 9:40 am

greg parker wrote:This was all explained in Dylan's "I shall be Free #10".

I'm gonna grow my hair down to my feet so strange (because I am a rotten Commie)
So I look like a walking mountain range (which is why you NEED Over-The Horizon brand Golf Carts)
And I’m gonna ride into Omaha on a horse (Omaha = Augusta because they have nearly the same number of letters and both use vowels)
Out to the country club and the golf course (naturally - that's where the counter-revolution is goin' down, baby!)
Carry The New York Times, shoot a few holes, blow their minds (speaks for itself really)

Of course! It was right there all the time. Why didn't we see it?

OMAHA = AUGUSTA

So Mutual of Omaha was merely a front. Yeah "insurance" indeed!

Fri 09 May 2014, 9:41 am

How about a compression algorithm? Just make sure it's lossless.

Fri 09 May 2014, 9:47 am

Albert Rossi wrote:How about a compression algorithm? Just make sure it's lossless.

Sounds good. I have a compression algorithm that is better than lossless, it's useless.

It simply removes most of the vowels and assigns a next closer word... like Omaha becomes Augusta.

Fri 09 May 2014, 9:51 am

I think that one comes with the Norton (oops, there it is again) anti-virus package.

But what you are probably not aware of is that, by the application of Doyle's Law,
you can demonstrate the phonological derivation of OMAHA from AUGUSTA. You
must keep in mind that the great Kaplan vowel shift did not occur east of the Mississippi,
and that lenition and aspiration occurred after the Great Compromise of 1850.

Fri 09 May 2014, 9:52 am

greg parker wrote:And I’m gonna ride into Omaha on a horse (Omaha = Augusta because they have nearly the same number of letters and both use vowels)

How about Montana?

♪ By myself I wouldn't
Have no boss
But I'd be raisin' my lonely Dental Floss
Raisin' my lonely Dental Floss
Raisin' my lonely Dental Floss
Well I might Ride along the border
With my tweezers gleamin'
In the moon-lighty night
And then I'd Get a cuppa cawfee
N' give my foot a push...
Just me 'n the pymgy pony
Over the Dennil Floss Bush
N' then I might just Jumb back on
An' ride Like a cowboy
Into the dawn to Montana
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay) ♪

Fri 09 May 2014, 11:29 pm

Frank looks like a man who knows the answers.

Sat 10 May 2014, 3:53 am

I want to thank everyone who contributed to this thread and to let you know I will be using it verbatim in my next concpiracy comedy, Bob and Don: What "IS" Is - Explaining Reality, due out fall of 2014 by Plagiarism Press, Moscow, Idaho.

And while I would be happy to do some profit-sharing, unfortunately all the profits will be absorbed by the production costs and there'll be nothing left.

Sux, I know.

If you don't like it, get a loyer...

Sat 10 May 2014, 3:56 am

Don't know that it would stand up in court. For it to be intellectual property, don't you have to demonstrate that it is intellectual?

On second thought, maybe it would, since intellectual and intelligent are not necessarily (or should I say, often) synonyms.

Sat 10 May 2014, 4:32 am

Albert Rossi wrote:Don't know that it would stand up in court. For it to be intellectual property, don't you have to demonstrate that it is intellectual?

On second thought, maybe it would, since intellectual and intelligent are not necessarily (or should I say, often) synonyms.

Al, I can't say that I can make heads or tails of what you're getting at.

Dem twenny dollar words don't mean much to me. Maybe they'll mean more to Vinny and the gang over in Jersey City... if you catch my drift.

Actually, I think this whole thing can be settled amicably (now there's a high-falootin' word, huh?) and save everyone the trouble of looking for any loyer. That is, if the book can make any money...

Since you point out that it might not be considered "intellectual" - property or otherwise - there may be a chance Plagiarism Press won't touch it.

Just my luck.

Sun 29 Jan 2017, 6:22 pm

But what would Grace Slick think of all of this?

Parker and McAdams are in charge...allegedly

Parker and McAdams are in charge...allegedly

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