Magic Tonsillectomy/Osteopaths

Interesting discussion Greg is having about osteopaths over at Deep Politics Forum. It brought back some sketchy memories when I was about 9 years old.
 
One of my dad's older sisters had a daughter who was about 15 years older than me (I don't remember exactly and everyone who knew the history/details is no longer around). My cousin's name was Sharon. Anyway, back in 1962 (?), Sharon had (emergency?) gall bladder surgery. She died after the surgery. There were some complications.  I remember hearing my aunt lament the fact that she was seeing an osteopath. I don't know how involved this osteopath was, but I remember my grief-stricken aunt saying she'd never use an osteopath again. Maybe they relied on the osteopath until things got bad. I should know more about this part of my family history, but I don't. But my aunt—rightly or wrongly—hated osteopaths after that.
 
Here's a picture of Sharon not long before she died.



Now while I don't know squat about this subject, I do think my anecdotal memories here somewhat support Greg's contention that osteopaths were a little "quacky" way back when.

Stan Dane wrote:Since I made the above post, I've been asking around for more information on Sharon. We did some genealogy checking and found she was born in October 1940 and died in January 1963.
 
My brother told me—and I have to stress this is second hand information he received from my mom before she died—that while in the Osteopathic Hospital, Sharon hemorrhaged and went into convulsions. She had long fingernails and scratched/gouged herself horribly while in intensive care, and it went on for some time before anybody noticed. She was neglected and then she was dead. My brother confirmed that "osteopath" was a dirty word in our family. Just anecdotal information here.     
 
A sidebar to all this was our learning that her two sons, who were 1 and 2 when she died, have been looking for information about her for well over a year. They said they never knew their real mother, and were never told exactly how or when their mother passed away. Their father remarried quickly and they said "it was not good at all." They are now in their early 50s with children of their own and grandchildren. One of the brothers "is slipping away" from some severe health problems. They said "it's a 'bucket list' thing, but a big hole in both our hearts."
 
I discovered her son's email address and reached out to him over an hour ago. (He may not even have the picture of her I posted above.) I hope to hear back from him.

Sometimes there's good that comes out of our efforts in ways we could never imagine. I hope this is one of them.

Thanks for sharing this story. It tends to lend weight to what was in the periodical I referenced at deep doo doo which had a story from the Health Insurance industry begging Osteopaths and osteo hospitals to quit the outlandish claims they were making on policies.

So when you say she was neglected... I doubt you'll find they neglected to collect. Hope this is a story with a good ending.

You're right in that you just never know with these things. A woman in Germany contacted Bill Kelly once because she believed a certain individual Bill was interested in from the MC side of things was her father whom she had never met - her mother having met and had a fling with him in MC. The person thought to be the father was contacted - they met and got along well... then finally the mother admitted - yes she had an affair with him. but he was not her father after all. Following that story over a few years was real roller coaster of emotions.

After three days of searching, Googling, calling, and many dead ends and cul-de-sacs, I made contact with Sharon's two sons earlier today. I can't begin to describe the emotions I felt as these 50-something year olds saw the above picture of their mother for the very first time in their lives while I was on the phone with them. The younger son couldn't even speak for a minute or so. The only picture he had of her was as a girl wearing a cowboy hat, he said. I shared every shred of the few memories of I had of Sharon. I promised I'd try to dig up even more.
 
What really struck me was the gratitude they expressed for my tenacity and perseverance in tracking them down. Real, unvarnished gratitude. When you experience it, it can move you tears. 

It did.

Thanks Stan. There are times when I can easily accept that if stories like this are all we achieve, then it has not by any means been a wasted effort.

Well said, Greg.

Amen

I ask that you all indulge me one more time on this.
 
After an exhaustive search through our family archives, I came up with about a half-dozen more photos of Sharon when she was a baby and a young girl. To top it off, I also discovered a few pictures of Sharon's two sons and their half-sister during an early 1960s Christmas. I scanned and sent them off yesterday. I also alerted some other relatives and they're making contact and checking to see what artifacts they have may have and to offer their memories to these guys.
 
I got an email from the youngest son just a short while ago. I scrubbed it a little but he said:

Incredible. Just really incredible. That is the only words I can muster. Chris and I have been lost for years. Our new stepmother and father at that time literally put us in hiding. Most days we were confined to our rooms, forgotten and punished just for the fact we were not my stepmothers. My Dad just went along with it. No one ever spoke of my mother. All Chris and I were sure of is was that we were not wanted and were told we were not one of them. Only after the school took us from our parents one summer and let Chris live with another family of 4 boys did he realize the way we were treated was definitely wrong. When he returned home he immediately ran away. They put him in juvenile home for running away and when he came back he told them he would have to leave. He would no longer stand the abuse and would venture out on his own. I did the same a year later. There was another entire family on our stepmother's side that began searching for us a few years back. They had only seen us when we were young and then we were gone. My stepmother hid us from her family as Chris and I began to communicate with our cousins. We have no family photos that were taken with Chris and I. Only the stepsisters and stepmom and my Dad. Not one, it is like we never existed.
 
To this day she has not uttered any words of forgiveness just no acknowledgement of us at all.
 
Simply put I had no mother from the time I was young enough to remember. As years passed we had families of our own, raised honestly and fairly. I had two step children plus my own I raised. Dad and my stepmom have never even asked to see their grandchildren.
 
So many years I have wondered where I came from. Is there a mom who is proud of me and my accomplishments and the man I turned out to be? Does she see me up there in what I have done? Have I done what she would do?
 
This sounds silly for a 51 year old man but not growing up without a mother, grandmother or grandfather is a terrible thing.  I do remember my Dads mom; we lived with her for a while. I know when she seen what my parents were doing to Chris and I it drove here crazy. I can remember my stepmom yelling at my Dad to put her in a home.
 
I just want to thank each of you for finding Chris and I. Especially Stan. I know my brother got the wonderful opportunity to see Grandma in 1985. I was just getting out of the Marine Corps and wasn’t able to go with him. I wish I knew how important it would be to me later in life. I will be making plans to see as many of my lost family as I can.  Please send me any other pictures you can dig up and I think I would like to meet my family that I never had.
 
I have been writing a book of our journeys I had named it Peanut Butter Balls for the small bit of peanut butter sandwich my brother would stick through the electrical socket for me. My Dad did well financially, but most of that time we were hungry and locked in our rooms.  It really is a book of how Chris was my only hope as a child. Our mother would be proud of him and how he would hold me and tell me that everything would be alright. Sometimes we were locked in cars while the rest of the family went shopping for hours. When I thought I would die of the sweltering heat my brother through his sweat and anguish would still care for me more. Just an incredible brother and the only reason I am here today.

What can I say?
 
I know this is grossly off topic but I just wanted to bring some closure here. And it all started because Greg raised questions about osteopaths back in the day. Raising questions raises more questions, and so on. Pretty soon you are going somewhere. Sometimes somewhere unexpected.

As Greg said once: "Sooner or later, things change. Sometimes even for the better." It's the most profound thing I can think of to express right now.

Thanks.

Stan,

Not ashamed to say I had tears welling as I read the email.

I wish the brothers all the very best, as I'm sure everyone here does.

All I can say is "Wow!"

Well done, Stan.